A Pauses that Shows Love

A few days ago my wife, two oldest children and I were sitting around discussing our day. As the conversation progressed my wife asked me a question. I can’t even remember what the exact topic was we were discussing or my wife’s exact question but what I do remember was that it was a very silly question.

I know that we all have been told there are no stupid questions and I am not saying that my wife’s question was stupid but I do remember that it was a sign she hadn’t been paying close attention to our conversation.

As soon as the question left her lips I paused because my first reaction was to mock the question that I was being asked. In fact I paused just long enough for my children to demonstrate that they had less restraint then me.

My children made fun of their loving mother because she had asked a silly question.

So I quickly jumped in and pointed out to my children that they shouldn’t treat their mother like that.

Score two for Dave!!! My children had pointed out the error in my wife’s ways (so I didn’t have to) and I was able to empress her by coming to her defense (because husbands should defend their wives).

But the truth is that nobody really needed to mock Sue. Regardless of who we are talking to, especially our spouses or parents we should treat others with respect at all times and making fun of people for what they have said typically doesn’t convey respect.

Our company is based on treating people the way we want to be treated. It is one of our core values.

On the day in the living room with my wife and children I paused before I spoke and lucky for me it gave me a chance to learn from my inaction for once. I got to see how important it is that we think before we speak. That paused allowed me to treat somebody I loved with respect rather than judgment.

Treating others the way you want to be treated sometimes involves not doing or saying something you are tempted to do.

Be a Genius not an Idiot

The book "Sparks" by Randy Goruk has a line that says “You are always on stage, so be authentic, but as you are being yourself, remember to always be professional and mature. Don’t put yourself in a position of bad mouthing others or yelling at someone. Be authentic, but don’t be an idiot.”


I send out tips from Sparks every week to key management personal at Willmar Electric. When I sent out the tip above I was blessed to receive the following addition from our Human Resource Director, Jay Tornquist.





"In some ways it is the ultimate vanity, if a person thinks that “being themselves” is the best way to be. That means we are stating that we are the best….perfect.


I believe that we need to be who we are, authentic, with the knowledge that we are led by a sinful nature (which, if not checked, demands we put ourselves first).


By treating others the way we want to be treated and by being People making a difference for People, it encourages us to put others first, giving us an opportunity to improve as a person, thereby increasing our professionalism, maturity, and sincerity.


People want to be led by (or be part of a group where) individuals that are confident in themselves but respect other opinions and are confident enough in themselves to listen and learn.


Some “leaders” have a need to knock others down to appear as though they are better- this is an Idiotic method.
Great leaders rise naturally and bring others up with them, which many times brings success and great accomplishments….this is Genius!"




Jay offers some awesome advice and at the same time he reinforces one of Willmar Electric’s core values.


Treat others the way you want to be treated.

Hard Work Doesn't Always Pay Off in the End.

A few weeks ago while hauling a high school friend of my sons to a sporting event we were talking about his potential college choices and I made that off handed comment that "even if he ended up in the NBA I would always think of him as the dork that shot baskets during every break in his little sisters basketball games." Recently that same family friend was offered a scholarship to play basketball at large school on the west coast. It was exciting news for the young man and everybody that knows him. When I heard the news I thought to myself all that shooting really paid off. But then I remembered another friend of my sons that also shot baskets during the breaks of his older sister’s games. That friend was done playing basketball by the time he was in 8th grade. Don't get me wrong this young man is also a good athlete. He was in last year’s state tennis meet!!! But in the end basketball didn't work out for him. It was the same thing for both young man. As soon as the whistle blew and the team headed to the bench for a timeout or a quarter break the brother would grab his ball and start shooting until the referee shoed them off the court so that the game could resume. In one case he result was a college scholarship (and maybe more) but in the other case the brother was done playing basketball by the time he was in 8th grade. Why the difference? Why did one young man excel while the other young man was passed by all his peers? Gifts and talents. One had desire and work hard and when it was combined with the body, gifts and talents God had blessed him with I reach high levels. But in the other case hard work and desire weren't enough. He lacked the body, gifts and talent to excel at basketball. What's my point? Hard work and desire are key ingredients for success in what we do in life. We need to study our craft and continuously improve but we are all made with unique gifts and talents. We each need to find what our gifts and talents are and make the most of those gifts and talents. Continuing to pursuit things that we aren't gifted in is a waste of resources. In one case it was basketball and that friend is making the most of it. In the other case it wasn't basketball and that friend realized it. So he went out and found other places that he was gifted in. The bottom line is hard Work doesn't always pay off in the end. Hard work can just be wasted energy if we spend that energy on the wrong things. I understand that shooting baskets during a break isn't necessarily waste energy. It is fun to shot hoops even if big time basketball isn't in your future. But in the larger picture of life how many of us know people that continue to work at a job that they are ill-suited for or know people that continue to expand energy in directions that they aren't gifted at? It can be the same feeling that we get when we work hard on something, even putting in overtime only to find out we didn’t do the project correctly or forgot to get a part so the task can’t be finished. Wasting resources isn't thrifty. Regardless if that resource is time, money or talent. It is important that we are always thrifty with what God has entrusted us with.