Willie Nelson sang ͞My Heroes have always been Cowboys.
About 10 years ago I read the book “Fred Factor” by Mark Sanborn. In the book are some suggested question to use in interviews. Whenever I give a job interview I ask what I call the ”Fred Factor” questions.
My favorite question is “who are your heroes?”
The question is very open ended and I don’t have a specific thing I am looking for but rather something I making sure the person doesn’t say. I’m looking for the person to give me the name of somebody the actually know.
I have gotten all kinds of answers in the past. For example, I’ve had people tell me Oprah or Hollywood movies stars. Those are red flags. It's such an impersonal answer say about yourself.
Who admits in public person they hold in highest regard is somebody they don’t really know. What I hear this person saying this person has given them a public persona they look up to. They are telling me the people in their lives don’t compare to fictional or distant people. It leaves me completely unimpressed.
Back here on Earth what am looking for is for the person to tell me about somebody they know, live with or around. Somebody from their world.
My follow up question going is, why are they your hero? I want the person being interviewed to be able to relate the person to themselves. To be clear most of the time the person being interviewed gives me a great answer.
Recently we kicked off a session with young leaders at Willmar Electric. The people in the session came from multiple departments within our company, some of the people in the group hardly knew each other. As part of the introduction I had everybody answer some personal questions, so we could get to know each other better.
One of the questions was of course. Who are your heroes?
Everybody gave me a good answer. No politicians or People magazine heroines.
Within the group of ten, seven had the same answer. Their Dad. (Sorry, Willie but no Cowboys listed as heroes among this group). Each spoke of different reasons why and in the cases of some in the room their Dad had passed away making it just a little more of a tender moment. (To be fair, two of us share the same Dad!)
It was quite moving. A room full of people and so many said the same thing, "my Dad."
As a father it was very humbling. People want to look up to their Dad and in the young leader’s session so many did. Dads can make a difference.
But it also hit home for a second reason. It has to do with the highlight of my week.
I went on a business trip with two co-workers, Brandon Lee and Paul Latimer, the two day prior to the young leaders. After two long days on the road the trip ended in Paul’s driveway. When his two daughters saw him, they came to the door and started screaming. Daddy, Daddy. The screaming morphed into a steady chant, Daddy, Daddy, Daddy!!! He could hardly get his bag inside without being attacked.
It was very moving. How cool, his kids missed him so much and where so excited to see them arrive home. Brandon and I literally snuck away so we wouldn’t interrupt this fun homecoming.
I guess Dad’s really do matter. So, I better make sure I’m being the best Dad I can be. A good reminder as I get ready for my three children to return home for the holidays.
Monday, November 20, 2017
Saturday, August 19, 2017
Everybody Makes Mistakes (Oh, Yes they Do)
Nobody likes to be wrong. Very few people enjoy admitting their mistakes.
My mom has a song she like to sing about how every makes mistakes (oh yes she does). I hate it. She doesn’t seem to care.
I remember my time as a Legion baseball coach. Players, opponents, parents and umpires often would point out my mistakes.
Sometimes they would find indirect ways to point out what they perceived to be my mistakes. Using phrases like “did you ever consider” or “maybe next time.”
Sometimes they would just directly say “you should have” or “I would have.”
I remember often coming home after games and confusing to my family I figured I made a handful of mistakes during the game. I would typically follow it up by saying “but they aren’t the same ones the parents and players think I made.”
Those days are over. Not my mistake making days but my coaching days.
Those days of public mistake making pale in comparison to one of the largest mistakes of my life.
Back in the early part of this century I held the honor of serving on the Willmar City Council. As an elected official I took very seriously my role of making sure we didn’t waste the citizens tax dollars. It wasn’t my money and I felt I was obligated to spend it wisely.
During my city council service a move was a foot to put Automated External Defibrillators (AED) in public buildings. The argument was by locating these device in public buildings lives could be saved.
I didn’t buy the idea of buying AEDs. I thought it was a waste of money. Would non-medical professionals even know how to use them? I remember thinking this was just a move by the manufacture of these devices to profit at the publics expense.
I not only voted against spending the money, I try to get others to join me. My memory says nobody was convinced to join my opposition. I recall the vote being 7-1. I was upset.
As time moved on I saw AED devices installed all over America. I heard stories of non-medical professionals saving lives with them.
Recently at a ceremony opening Cianbro’s, a large contractor in Pittsfield Maine, first-class training center my foolishness hit me full force. As the speaker went through the safety moment and pointed out the location of the AED, should it be needed, I was mentally thrown back in time to my time on the city council.
It left me sitting there wondering what if I had won my argument and saved money by not buying these life saving devices? Could it have caused somebody to lose their life? What if I had carried my passion to the next level and crusaded against AEDs outside of the city of Willmar?
I was wrong and I realized it. I realized my wrongness years ago but scale of my mistake just hit me as I sat in the audience last week. The impact of being wrong had no effect on the rest of the world because the rest of the council didn’t listen to my pleadings. Thankfully!!!
I also wonder how often are current politicians realize, and admit their mistakes. Lately it seems the trend is “double down” on their mistakes.
My mom has a song she like to sing about how every makes mistakes (oh yes she does). I hate it. She doesn’t seem to care.
I remember my time as a Legion baseball coach. Players, opponents, parents and umpires often would point out my mistakes.
Sometimes they would find indirect ways to point out what they perceived to be my mistakes. Using phrases like “did you ever consider” or “maybe next time.”
Sometimes they would just directly say “you should have” or “I would have.”
I remember often coming home after games and confusing to my family I figured I made a handful of mistakes during the game. I would typically follow it up by saying “but they aren’t the same ones the parents and players think I made.”
Those days are over. Not my mistake making days but my coaching days.
Those days of public mistake making pale in comparison to one of the largest mistakes of my life.
Back in the early part of this century I held the honor of serving on the Willmar City Council. As an elected official I took very seriously my role of making sure we didn’t waste the citizens tax dollars. It wasn’t my money and I felt I was obligated to spend it wisely.
During my city council service a move was a foot to put Automated External Defibrillators (AED) in public buildings. The argument was by locating these device in public buildings lives could be saved.
I didn’t buy the idea of buying AEDs. I thought it was a waste of money. Would non-medical professionals even know how to use them? I remember thinking this was just a move by the manufacture of these devices to profit at the publics expense.
I not only voted against spending the money, I try to get others to join me. My memory says nobody was convinced to join my opposition. I recall the vote being 7-1. I was upset.
As time moved on I saw AED devices installed all over America. I heard stories of non-medical professionals saving lives with them.
Recently at a ceremony opening Cianbro’s, a large contractor in Pittsfield Maine, first-class training center my foolishness hit me full force. As the speaker went through the safety moment and pointed out the location of the AED, should it be needed, I was mentally thrown back in time to my time on the city council.
It left me sitting there wondering what if I had won my argument and saved money by not buying these life saving devices? Could it have caused somebody to lose their life? What if I had carried my passion to the next level and crusaded against AEDs outside of the city of Willmar?
I was wrong and I realized it. I realized my wrongness years ago but scale of my mistake just hit me as I sat in the audience last week. The impact of being wrong had no effect on the rest of the world because the rest of the council didn’t listen to my pleadings. Thankfully!!!
I also wonder how often are current politicians realize, and admit their mistakes. Lately it seems the trend is “double down” on their mistakes.
Friday, June 30, 2017
Diversity in Baseball Fans
People who know me know I watch a lot of baseball games. Lately I have been lucky enough to be able to go to a couple of games in person. In addition to enjoying baseball I also get to meet some new people.
We are all God’s children and he loves each of us. My experience has shown me how unique people can be despite having a common interest. I want to high three completely different fans I ran into recently enjoying the national pastime. Each of people I highlight chose to go to the game but the diversity of the crowd provides a great life lesson.
Fan #1. I first met this fan was when she required everybody in her row, including me, to stand up to let her by. We she got to the end of the row she stopped right in front of me and bought her granddaughter Cotton Candy. She had flagged the vendor down in typical stadium fashion but instead of following the normal custom of handing her money down the row while the Cotton Candy was handed down in the reserve direction she walked both items down the row.
Odd but as the game worn on you could tell she didn’t go to a lot games. But despite not knowing all the ballpark customs she appeared to have a great time.
Fan #2. This is really a group of fans. This group of millennials sit near me and also bought concessions except they went to the hallway for each of the items. Several times. I never got up and down so much in my entire life. Some the group came about 3 innings late and other left about 5 innings early. They sat backwards in their seats at times to talk to the people behind them. For this group of 9 it seemed to only be a social event. When Mike, my son, pointed out how it seemed they viewed the game as a social outing I said “yeah I get the feeling they are just looking at the games as a bar with a $20 cover charge.”
Like fan #1 they appeared to have a great time and didn’t bother me in the least (well OK the one guy could have used a hair wash).
Fan #3. My favorite fan. I didn’t notice him until my son pointed out how “MLB needs more people like him.” He was a father of three who in addition to his children had what appeared to be his wife and mother-in-law with him at the game. His team was losing but in the bottom of the ninth he put on his rally hat and cheered with all his heart. His team was down by 5 when the inning started but as they tried to come back he got more and more energy.
His team ended up losing by 2 runs but Fan #3 left the game with a smile on his face.
He was never annoying. He gave out positive encouragement to his family to cheer on the home team. Even looked at my son and said, “hey Boston,” Mike was wearing a Red Sox hat, “it’s possible, start cheering.” All while holding a two-year-old. I told Mike, “he is making sure his youngster will also be a big fan.” It warmed my heart.
This family also appeared to be having a great time.
Seeing these three types of fans all enjoying the game I love in 3 unique ways all different from me made me appreciate diversity. These fans were from different generations, nationalities, and social class. But it wasn’t just those typical ways of thinking about diversity that made me appreciate them. It was the different approaches they took to the situation.
They gave me quite the life lesson in how to look at things from angles besides my own.
We are all God’s children and he loves each of us. My experience has shown me how unique people can be despite having a common interest. I want to high three completely different fans I ran into recently enjoying the national pastime. Each of people I highlight chose to go to the game but the diversity of the crowd provides a great life lesson.
Fan #1. I first met this fan was when she required everybody in her row, including me, to stand up to let her by. We she got to the end of the row she stopped right in front of me and bought her granddaughter Cotton Candy. She had flagged the vendor down in typical stadium fashion but instead of following the normal custom of handing her money down the row while the Cotton Candy was handed down in the reserve direction she walked both items down the row.
Odd but as the game worn on you could tell she didn’t go to a lot games. But despite not knowing all the ballpark customs she appeared to have a great time.
Fan #2. This is really a group of fans. This group of millennials sit near me and also bought concessions except they went to the hallway for each of the items. Several times. I never got up and down so much in my entire life. Some the group came about 3 innings late and other left about 5 innings early. They sat backwards in their seats at times to talk to the people behind them. For this group of 9 it seemed to only be a social event. When Mike, my son, pointed out how it seemed they viewed the game as a social outing I said “yeah I get the feeling they are just looking at the games as a bar with a $20 cover charge.”
Like fan #1 they appeared to have a great time and didn’t bother me in the least (well OK the one guy could have used a hair wash).
Fan #3. My favorite fan. I didn’t notice him until my son pointed out how “MLB needs more people like him.” He was a father of three who in addition to his children had what appeared to be his wife and mother-in-law with him at the game. His team was losing but in the bottom of the ninth he put on his rally hat and cheered with all his heart. His team was down by 5 when the inning started but as they tried to come back he got more and more energy.
His team ended up losing by 2 runs but Fan #3 left the game with a smile on his face.
He was never annoying. He gave out positive encouragement to his family to cheer on the home team. Even looked at my son and said, “hey Boston,” Mike was wearing a Red Sox hat, “it’s possible, start cheering.” All while holding a two-year-old. I told Mike, “he is making sure his youngster will also be a big fan.” It warmed my heart.
This family also appeared to be having a great time.
Seeing these three types of fans all enjoying the game I love in 3 unique ways all different from me made me appreciate diversity. These fans were from different generations, nationalities, and social class. But it wasn’t just those typical ways of thinking about diversity that made me appreciate them. It was the different approaches they took to the situation.
They gave me quite the life lesson in how to look at things from angles besides my own.
Monday, January 23, 2017
Better People
A while ago Sue and I had some friend over to our house. Together the four of us enjoyed a great night of conversation and board games. Eventually the time came for our friends to leave. Even the dog, Tessie, was sorry to see them leave. The dog of course expressed her emotions more openly by jumping on them as they walked out the door.
After our friends left Sue and I noted how spending time with this couple makes us better. They are more than good friends who we enjoy spending time with but we find they make us better people.
They make us better Christians, better parents, and smarter human beings. They energize us. The evening reminded me of a quote I heard a few year ago. It is attributed to businessman Jim Rohn who once said, “You’re the average of the five people you spend most of your time with.”
It is a very challenging statement really. It challenges us to make sure we are spending our time not only with the right crowd but with people who lift us up.
Randy Travis put it to song in “Better Class of Losers.” It’s not about social status. “High society” can bring out the worst in you. (Check out Keeping up with the Kardashians for a deeper dive on this concept!)
It’s about bringing out the best you.
In some cases improving your top 5 can mean complete changing your lifestyle. It doesn’t necessarily mean completely leave your current group of friends (or extend family) but it might mean lowering the time you spend with some.
It could mean getting a new job.
I know at times in my life I have had to completely sever some of my acquaintance behind because were bad for me.
To some this might seem like an unchristian way at looking at life. You might wonder about how you can a reach out to people or mentor others if you only spend your time with people who lift you up?
The answer is to make sure you’re maintaining your average with 5 people who bring you up while at the same time mentor and reach out to others.
If you focus on raising everybody including yourself up you will do just fine.
All I ask is you analyze your current situation and make sure everybody is moving in the right direction. Let’s try to make each better.
Hopefully this doesn’t cause me to lose any friends but if it does I will understand why.
(To those of you leaving me behind, I’m sorry I brought you down.)
After our friends left Sue and I noted how spending time with this couple makes us better. They are more than good friends who we enjoy spending time with but we find they make us better people.
They make us better Christians, better parents, and smarter human beings. They energize us. The evening reminded me of a quote I heard a few year ago. It is attributed to businessman Jim Rohn who once said, “You’re the average of the five people you spend most of your time with.”
It is a very challenging statement really. It challenges us to make sure we are spending our time not only with the right crowd but with people who lift us up.
Randy Travis put it to song in “Better Class of Losers.” It’s not about social status. “High society” can bring out the worst in you. (Check out Keeping up with the Kardashians for a deeper dive on this concept!)
It’s about bringing out the best you.
In some cases improving your top 5 can mean complete changing your lifestyle. It doesn’t necessarily mean completely leave your current group of friends (or extend family) but it might mean lowering the time you spend with some.
It could mean getting a new job.
I know at times in my life I have had to completely sever some of my acquaintance behind because were bad for me.
To some this might seem like an unchristian way at looking at life. You might wonder about how you can a reach out to people or mentor others if you only spend your time with people who lift you up?
The answer is to make sure you’re maintaining your average with 5 people who bring you up while at the same time mentor and reach out to others.
If you focus on raising everybody including yourself up you will do just fine.
All I ask is you analyze your current situation and make sure everybody is moving in the right direction. Let’s try to make each better.
Hopefully this doesn’t cause me to lose any friends but if it does I will understand why.
(To those of you leaving me behind, I’m sorry I brought you down.)
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